Do you want to communicate better and stop arguing? Are you worried that you and your partner are drifting apart and losing the spark you used to have? A fulfilling relationship is worth investing in. With couples therapy, you can learn to trust again, communicate better, and find a way to constructively solve disagreements.
Empathetic couples therapy
As we first get to know each other, I will make a thorough assessment of your situation, so that I understand the concerns and needs of both sides, and become familiar with your communication styles.
As a couples therapist, I will be an objective, but also active, mediator between you. Both you and your partner have a right to be heard and to be listened to. In my office, you will find the safe, supportive environment you need to express yourselves and explore ways to grow together.
When your relationship has been distant for months, you can actually lose the skill of effective communication with each other. It’s easy to get trapped in a vicious circle where you avoid each other just to stop yourself from getting trapped into another argument.
Couples therapy can help you terminate the cycle. Learning to communicate again in a real and meaningful way involves articulating your thoughts, feelings, desires, and hopes, as well as listening to those of your partners. It’s hard work, but the rewards can last a lifetime.
Emotionally Focused Therapy
A key part of my success in helping couples renew their relationships is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a scientifically-based approach which works by focussing on the emotions as the main driving force of your relationships. Instead of spending time trying to work out why you feel the way or do, or coming up with practical sounding suggestions that are actually impossible to implement, in EFT we focus on getting you both to understand what it is you are actually feeling. Once you are in touch with what you are experiencing in the here and now, previously intractable relationship problems quickly become surmountable.
Many of my clients come to me after having tried different types of couples therapy without seeing an improvement in their relationship. Often this is because they learned ‘practical tools and strategies’ that make perfect sense, but proved impossible to implement outside of the therapist’s office. In truth, they more or less knew what they needed to do to improve their relationship, but they couldn’t summon up the emotional reserves to do it. EFT gave them the ability to build up ’emotional capital’, which they could then spend on expressing love and affection in their daily life.
Do you and your partner have different ideas about bringing up children? Are you unable to get on with your in-laws? In our diverse state of California, it is very common for love to cross cultural divides. In couples therapy, I have helped many couples navigate these differences and learn strategies to live together as a well functioning unit. With the right help, you can turn your differences into a source of strength.
Put your relationship first, put yourself first
For couples therapy in Sebastopol for Santa Rosa, Petaluma, Sebastopol, and the West County, contact Toby Ellen French. She is a specialist in Emotionally Focused Therapy and provides therapy for individuals, couples, and groups. Take the first step towards a more fulfilling and happy relationship by picking up the phone or filling out the contact form.Please share this post!